The E.O.N. - Users Manual

Congratulations, citizen! You've just purchased the best weapon in the universe! The E.O.N. is not only an unsurpassed multi-use firearm, but a family heirloom for generations to come. Some may say that the cost is prohibitive, but once you've acquired one and survived a few tight spots, you'll agree that no matter how dire the situation is, the E.O.N. can practically guarantee that you will emerge victorious! As part of its namesake guarantee, the E.O.N. will last at least 1,000 years! without any need for maintenance or service of any kind. All you need is a sharp eye, a steady hand, and you can blaze a trail of destruction across galaxies.

The E.O.N. comes with several accessories to preserve and protect your investment. First, the display base provides a simple yet elegant way to store your E.O.N. when not in use. Though it's practically impossible to damage the E.O.N. without destroying it completely, the display base is made from far less damage-resistant materials in order to reduce manufacturing costs. If your display base becomes lost or damaged in any way, please contact your nearest dealer for a replacement.

The second most prominent accessory is the scope. The liquid lens power of the scope can extend your accuracy to over 5,000 meters! Some owners have stipulated that they could acheive O.S.K. (one-shot-kill) at over 6,000 meters with the E.O.N. if it is properly mounted on a hard surface.

When you need to take a sniper shot quickly, the E.O.N. is there and ready! The four holes on the top rear of the weapon provide fast and easy mounting of the scope.

Now you're ready to personally bring about the End Of Negotiations from a safe and anonymous distance!

After the scope, the final and most important item is the remote. Each remote is permanently calibrated to emit a very specific spectrum of light. The magnetic locks that secure the access panels of the E.O.N. will only open if the correct remote is used. If any other remote is used, the sensors will not respond. Each E.O.N. and its remote are set to unique frequencies which cannot be replicated. The sensors on the magnetic locks are also unalterable.

Any attempt to modify either the remote or the magnetic locks will trigger an immediate self-destruct program. This program (which takes 3 seconds to complete!) triggers a massive feedback loop in the system power, creating an incendiary zone of approximately 50 meters of total devastation. If you lose your remote, you might as well jettison your E.O.N. into the heart of the nearest star as it has now become worthless!

The main power access panel is located on the top rear of the weapon and is secured by one of the magnetic locks.

Carefully aim the remote at the sensor.

Once the access panel has been properly unlocked, you have several options. First, you should immediately familiarize yourself with the main power display panel. The main power display allows you to activate the system power, set the weapon to single or auto fire, and monitor the remaining fuel capacity of each energy cell.

If the scope is not required, the E.O.N. comes with a flip-up targeting reticle which provides O.S.K. (one-shot-kill) ability up to 1,000 meters.

The length of the E.O.N. provides budding sharpshooters with many landmarks by which to adjust their aim. The ridges on the main access panel are the first indicator of a properly lined up shot. Because of the ridges evocative shape, many have referred to this action as "takin' a shot through the mountains."

The System Power of the E.O.N. is visible underneath a special access cover on either side of the weapon. There are two systems, one for each barrel. You would be well advised to monitor the fluctuations of the individual systems to get a better idea of the quality of fuel you are using.

Use the remote control carefully to open the magnetic lock.

Once the magnetic lock is opened, you have access to the fingerprint ID button.

With the final cover opened, you can gaze into the blazing orange infinity that is the System Power module!

You should always inspect the converters in the System Power module and memorize their default cycling pattern. Depending on the purity of the special fuel you obtain (more details below), the converters may cycle at different rates, resulting in one barrel firing slightly faster or slower than the other.

Click here to see the fluctuations in action!

Accessing the energy cells is a simple process. First, choose which cell you want open, then get the remote.

Once again, use the remote to open the magnetic lock to access the fingerprint ID button.

Press the fingerprint ID button. Remember to use the same finger every time!

Remove the energy cell holding tab cover.

Slide the energy cell holding tab out.

Now the energy cell is ready to be removed. Grasp it carefully!

Carefully pry the energy cell off it's magnetic power couplings.

Once the energy cell has been removed, you have a better view of the magnetic power couplings on the right and the green holding tab alignment slots on the left. In the case of a prolonged firefight, the energy cells may warm up, so the dual vents in the center provide cooling.

The tan coupling on the left helps you to properly align the energy cell when you've finished changing out the fuel.

To access the inside of the energy cell, simple remove the top clamp and take the four walls off. What type of fuel makes the E.O.N. such a formidable weapon?

That's right, SPAMCAKE! The unique power system of the E.O.N. has been designed to transmute this too-abundant substance into an endless hail of HOT PINK OBLITERATION! Just two bricks of spamcake are enough to power the E.O.N. for two weeks of continuous use! What other firearm can possibly come close?! Yes, 100% pure spamcake can be harder to find, but the unmatched effeciency of the converters will give you plenty of time to acquire new ones.

Each energy cell slot has been numbered to ensure that the particular cell is always paired up with its corresponding converter. This is very important as the dual systems have some individual variances which are kept to a minimum by ensuring that their respective parts remain matched.

Whenever the trigger is pulled, an indicator light located just forward of the energy cell will activate. The steadiness of this light will tell you how effeciently the spamcake converter is working in conjuction with the firing mechanism. If the light begins to flicker or pulsate in any way, you may need to charge the energy cell with a higher quality spamcake bar.

Click here to observe one displaying smooth, pure ready-to-obliterate action!

The dual barrels will often become heated in the thick of battle, so they have been wrapped in the finest quality and most advanced heat sink technology available. Even Imperial officers have remarked positively on the special styling and top-notch functionality!

Now that you've completed your basic orientation in the E.O.N.'s functions, one more extremely important piece of information must be conveyed: if you ever find yourself staring down the barrel of this weapon, rest assured that your troubles in life are over, as it will be the last thing you ever see!

Click here to preview the last few milliseconds of your miserable existence!

A last funny picture. This is the initial sketch I made for the E.O.N. I thought that those of you who often do sketches before building might be interested to see how things changed from inception to finished MOC.

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